Is He The One?

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts..."

Isaiah 55:8-9 NIV

When you read about Jesus' life from the very beginning the question was always, Really, he's the one? or How could he be the one? Look where he came from. Look at his family. "Can anything good come from that?" Over and over and over again, from his conception to today, the question has always been there. For those of us who believe, it is possible.  But I am reminded of the father who said to Jesus, "I believe.  Help my unbelief."

Long before Jesus was born, the prophets were telling of the one that would come to save God's chosen people. For hundreds of years the stories were told of he that would come and rescue them from their oppression, from their own foolishness, from everything bad that surrounded and was within them. Everyone knew he would come riding in on a stallion with his armies of men to beat and kill and take what they believed to have been stolen from them, their rights, their humanity, their comfort, their luxuries. One day God would send that person, that guy, to save them and they would never have to worry again. God would provide.

 And so they waited.  Through all of the prophets.  Through all of the kings.  Through all of the rabbis and priests and Pharisees and Sadducees.  And they asked over and over again, “Is HE the one?”  Each one a new hope, new dreams, new plans, but each one dashed into disappointment and yet another lost moment. 

Until this person named Jesus.  He wasn’t the first to be named that, nor was he the last.  He wasn’t even the first one from Nazareth.  The rumors began from the very moment of his conception.  Elizabeth saw it and felt it, remember?  Her unborn baby leapt in her womb. You know she had to tell Zechariah.  Did she tell others?  Wouldn’t you?  If you had seen the miraculous things they had seen and been a part of, wouldn’t you share what you knew to be true?

The religious leaders he spoke with when he was twelve, the ones he sat with, the ones he stayed with when his parents couldn’t find him on their journey home after the Passover celebration.  Surely someone or several someones told others about the amazing things this child shared.  He told them, "Where else would I be but in my father's house?"

Or those at the wedding celebration where Mary asked and Jesus turned the water into wine.  Those that witnessed that miracle shared with others; you know they did.  That’s what we humans do.  That’s what this particular medium, this online storytelling, is all about.  “I know something that you don’t know so I will share it with all of you.”  It’s our very nature.

The followers who were with him every day thought they knew it.  “He’s the one!  Come with us and see!”  And the numbers grew and grew wherever he was.  “He’s the one! The time will come when he will shed this mask of servitude and poverty and show us all that he’s the one.  Just wait!”

Jesus said the time was near so preparations were being made.  It’s easy now to look back and see that they all missed his message, “It won’t be like you think.  God doesn’t see things the way that you all see things.  That’s what I’ve been trying to teach you.  Listen!  It won’t be what you think.”

But no one understood.  When he washed their feet and dined with the sinners.  When he healed those whom others wanted to stone they whispered among themselves.  When he ‘misinterpreted’ what was clearly written in the Book of Moses.  Wait, was he the one?  He clearly wasn’t acting the way they had believed for all time the savior would act. 

And then the week arrived.  This would be it!  Now he would finally show himself to be who they believed him to be!  After all, he said the "The time is at hand."  Hallelujah!  And still he told them, “It won’t be as you think.”

So when he was arrested, they couldn’t believe in him as the savior.  God’s savior, God’s appointed king, wouldn’t allow himself to be arrested, beaten, and hung on a cross!  He must be an imposter!  He doesn’t fit what we think a savior should be so he’s not the one.  Forget that we followed him for years, that we saw with our own eyes the miracles he performed.  It was all magic!  We knew it all the time!  He’s a fake!  I told you so!

Even his closest friends and followers gave up.  It wasn’t true.  He wasn’t the one.  He didn’t do what we thought he would do so he’s not the one.  He was a great friend, a wonderful teacher, but he just wasn’t the one.

And I would suggest more than two thousand years later, we are still waiting for that guy, the one.  You know, the one who will ride in on his stallion, leading his great army to save us.  We watch the news.  We listen to our politicians.  We believe that the great leader, the Savior, will come riding in one day soon and finally rescue us from this great mess we have created, never really understanding that he was here and we ignored all of his pleas, all of his teachings, all of his love. 

He was here.  He was the one. And we missed it.

We look to entertainers.  We look to politicians.  We look to presidents.  We look to anyone who will tell us what we want to hear and make us believe we can count on them to show us the way.  He was here.  But he didn’t say and do the things we thought he would. 

And we still ask, “Is he the one?”  I would suggest that there will still be some of us who won't recognize him when he does (the Bible tells us so).  I would suggest that as much as some folks claim they read their Bible, and I don't doubt it, that like those folks who walked and talked with him, there will be some who won't recognize him because he still won't look and act like they think he should look and act. 

And the question will be, "Is He the one?"

“I don’t think the way you think.

    The way you work isn’t the way I work.”

        God’s Decree.

“For as the sky soars high above earth,

    so the way I work surpasses the way you work,

    and the way I think is beyond the way you think..."

Isaiah 55:8-9 MSG

Everyday Hope

Every day can be like Christmas in its love and its peace if our hearts open up and make room for love. The holy child is waiting to be born in every instant, not just once a year. Marianne Williamson

O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth shall show forth Your praise. Psalm 51:15 AMP

So, here we are in this first week of the season of Advent.

 

My life took a turn six weeks ago that, while not totally unexpected, surprised me none-the-less.  The church that I have worked for over the past seven and a half years, struggling with giving, eliminated my position. 

Boom!  Just like that I was out of a job. 

It was time.  I had said years ago when I took the position, that five to seven years would be about right.  If we hadn’t made a difference in that time, it was not possible and it would be time to “shake the dust off my feet and move on.”

It has been a tumultuous year…retirement (sorta, kinda) of an old staff member, new staff member totally ill-equipped for the position, church literally torn up as new roof and re-working of the sanctuary took place, old staff person back – temporarily, new equipment in place and working, new staff member in place, son is very ill, budget problems at the church…manufactured budget problems, but budget problems none-the-less.  Gotta have a secretary.  Gotta have a custodian.  Can’t change the minister until the Bishop and Cabinet make the switch.

 

Program director can go.

Really.  I was OK with it.  Not ok with the way they did it, but ok that it happened.  It was time. 

These were the same issues they were dealing with when I walked in all those years ago.  Same people causing it.  Obviously, not much learned here. 

As the pastor said to me one day, “Where is Christ in all of this?  Do they not know him? There is someone waiting in every corner to attack.” And he was right.  He was discouraged.  I was disheartened.  We had worked so hard.  He likened himself to the Apostle Paul.  I have tended to think of myself as Elijah.  Not that we are that holy, please don’t misunderstand, but that they just never seemed to catch a break.  They worked and worked to help others know Christ and they ended up in prison again and again.  They had to run away and hide so as not to be killed by the queen.  All because they knew the Lord and they wanted others to know him too.

But you can’t make people learn.  I know this.  Years of teaching has taught me this lesson.

So, I have lost my job and, more than that, I have lost my church.

 

God continues to provide and next week I will start a new job in a new place.  While it will still be a few weeks before we will be able to physically move there, the work will begin and I am looking forward to going back to my early childhood days in a new state and city.  New challenges.  New friends.

And I look forward to being able to attend the church of my choice, rather than having to be at work.  I look forward to NOT being responsible for the details that get overlooked by the volunteers so that it all flows seamlessly.  I look forward to worshiping God and relaxing in his sanctuary.

It did not go unnoticed by me that this past Sunday was the first Sunday in Advent.  And, while I have not attended church outside of my living room, I have worshiped God right here in my own sanctuary, the place he has given me to lay down my head for the past six years.  Andy Stanley has been leading me through The Bible for Grownups.  If you haven’t seen this study, I would encourage you to do so.  It’s not about the Bible stories that we’ve all heard since we were children.  It’s about how the Bible came to be The Bible.  I’ve taught a big part of what he teaches here, but he puts it together so much better than I ever could.

 

And it made me think.  The first Sunday of Advent.  The Sunday of HOPE.  That’s a good thought for this Sunday in my life.  I think I’ve spent the last year or more trying desperately to hang on to hope…for my church, for my son, for my future. 

And then I had lunch with one of my young friends.  He, too, is struggling with this decision…how does the behavior of some of these people fit with what we have taught him (church people are still people – completely fallible and every one of us struggling to get through the day looking at least a very little bit like Christ).

 

Every day can be like Christmas in its love and its peace if our hearts open up and make room for love. The holy child is waiting to be born in every instant, not just once a year. Marianne Williamson

So when I read this quote by Marianne Williamson, someone I have followed for over thirty-five years, that little flame in my heart flickered and I asked the question, “Why do we wait for this one month out of the year?”

Christmas is about love and peace.  Wars have stopped for just this one day to remember.  People spend four weeks in parties and concerts and caroling and baking and shopping and …

Why is this?

Jesus didn’t come so we would celebrate his birthday once a year; so we can have big parties and celebrations.  He wasn’t opposed to parties and celebrations but if we make these things the pathway to Christ, then we’ve really missed the purpose of his coming.

For over four hundred years people had been crying for the Messiah.  They wanted to be saved.  They envisioned the leader riding in on his stallion, bringing his vast army to very publicly defeat everything bad in their lives.  “PLEASE save us,” they cried.  And they waited.  Few had hope.  Most had determined, like me – I’m afraid, that this was it.  This was all there might ever be.

And then a baby was born.

 

Not at all like they had assumed it would happen and because it didn’t happen the way they thought it would, many wouldn’t believe it.

But it did.  And if we make it all about that night, we have missed his message.  Hope, Peace, Love, and Joy.  If we know him, not of him, but really know him, we are filled with these things.  Even when we begin to wonder if perhaps we’ve been wrong about all of it, when we know him that little flame is still there and he reaches down into our very being and reminds us.

 

“I know,” he says.  “I’ve been where you are.   I know how tired you are, how discouraged you are, how painful this has been.  I know and I’m here.”

Instead of filling every moment of this season with all the ‘stuff’ we normally do, what if we were to take this time and be still with Him?  How would our season of Advent and our remembrance of the birth of our Savior be different, if we hadn’t worn ourselves out doing all the things we all do?

I have HOPE that each one of us will find that time and place to be still with him and when we do, then we’ll praise him every day, we’ll celebrate him every day, we’ll honor him every instant of every day.  And then…

O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth shall show forth Your praise. Psalm 51:15 AMP

What Life is About

Life isn't about keeping score. It's not about how many friends you have. Or how many people call you. Or how accepted or unaccepted you are. Not about if you have plans this weekend. Or if you're alone. It isn't about who you're dating, who you used to date, how many people you've dated, or if you haven't been with anyone at all. It isn't about who you have kissed. It's not about sex. It isn't about who your family is or how much money they have. Or what kind of car you drive. Or where you're sent to school.

It's not about how beautiful or ugly you are. Or what clothes you wear, what shoes you have on, or what kind of music you listen to. It's not about if your hair is blonde, red, black, brown, or green. Or if your skin is too light or too dark.

It's not about what grades you get, how smart you are, how smart everyone else thinks you are, or how smart standardized tests say you are. Or if this teacher likes you, or if this guy/girl likes you. Or what clubs you're in, or how good you are at "your" sport. It's not about representing your whole being on a piece of paper and seeing who will "accept the written you."

But life is about who you love and who you hurt. It's about who you make happy or unhappy purposefully. It's about keeping or betraying trust. It's about friendship, used as sanctity, or as a weapon. It's about what you say and mean, maybe hurtful, maybe heartening. About starting rumors and contributing to petty gossip. It's about what judgments you pass and why. And who your judgments are spread to.

It's about who you've ignored with full control and intention. It's about jealousy, fear, pain, ignorance, and revenge. It's about carrying inner hate and love, letting it grow and spreading it.

But most of all, it's about using your life to touch or poison other people's hearts in such a way that could never have occurred alone. Only you choose the way these hearts are affected and those choices are what life is all about.   Author Unknown

On one occasion when Jesus was going to the house of a leader of the Pharisees to eat a meal on the Sabbath, they were watching him closely…

 

When he noticed how the guests chose the places of honor, he told them a parable. “When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet, do not sit down at the place of honor, in case someone more distinguished than you has been invited by your host; and the host who invited both of you may come and say to you, ‘Give this person your place,’ and then in disgrace you would start to take the lowest place.

 

But when you are invited, go and sit down at the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he may say to you, ‘Friend, move up higher’; then you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at the table with you.  For all who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” He said also to the one who had invited him, “When you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, in case they may invite you in return, and you would be repaid.  But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you, for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”

Luke 14:1, 7-14

Make a new friend, remember an old friend, BE a friend!

 

Make it a GREAT day!

 

 



The Rock



An old farmer had plowed around a large rock in one of his fields for years. He had broken several plowshares and a cultivator on it and had grown rather morbid about the rock.

After breaking another plowshare one day, and remembering all the trouble the rock had caused him through the years, he finally decided to do something about it.

When he put the crowbar under the rock, he was surprised to discover that it was only about six inches thick and that he could break it up easily with a sledgehammer. As he was carting the pieces away he had to smile, remembering all the trouble that the rock had caused him over the years and how easy it would have been to get rid of it sooner.

- Brian Cavanaugh
“The Sower’s Seeds”


I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe.

Ephesians 1:18-19

The Teacup

There was a couple who used to go to England to shop in the beautiful stores. They both liked antiques and pottery and especially teacups. This was their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary.

One day in this beautiful shop they saw a beautiful teacup. They said, "May we see that? We've never seen one quite so beautiful." As the lady handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke.

"You don't understand," it said. "I haven't always been a teacup. There was a time when I was red and I was clay." My master took me and rolled me and patted me over and over and I yelled out, "let me alone", but he only smiled, "Not yet."

"Then I was placed on a spinning wheel," the teacup said, "and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. Stop it! I'm getting dizzy!" I screamed. But the master only nodded and said, 'Not yet."

Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such heat. I wondered why he wanted to burn me, and I yelled and knocked at the door. I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as He shook his head, "Not yet."

Finally the door opened, he put me on the shelf, and I began to cool. "There, that's better," I said. And he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible. I thought I would gag. "Stop it, stop it!" I cried. He only nodded, "Not yet."

Then suddenly he put me back into the oven, not like the first one. This was twice as hot and I knew I would suffocate. I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried. All the time I could see him through the opening nodding his head saying, "Not yet."

Then I knew there wasn't any hope. I would never make it. I was ready to give up. But the door opened and he took me out and placed me on the shelf. One hour later he handed me a mirror and said, "Look at yourself." And I did. I said, "That's not me; that couldn't be me. It's beautiful. I'm beautiful."

"I want you to remember, then," he said, "I know it hurts to be rolled and patted, but if I had left you alone, you'd have dried up. I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I knew it hurt and was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn't put you there, you would have cracked. I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all over, but if I hadn't done that, you never would have hardened; you would not have had any color in your life. And if I hadn't put you back in that second oven, you wouldn't survive for very long because the hardness would not have held. Now you are a finished product. You are what I had in mind when I first began with you."

God knows what He's doing (for all of us).
He is the Potter, and we are His clay.
He will mold us and make us,
So that we may be made into a flawless piece of work
To fulfill His good, pleasing, and perfect will.
No temptation has seized you except what is common to man.
And God is faithful; he will not tempt you beyond what you can bear.
(1 Corinthians 10:13)

The Thirty Maybe's



Maybe love has always been
Maybe we made up hate
Maybe we don't find God because we don't look
Maybe this is heaven
Maybe we invented hell
Maybe there is always hope
Maybe we pretend there is not
Maybe we know all the answers
Maybe we ask the wrong questions
Maybe we can share this world
Maybe we don't have to fight
Maybe we wrote the script
Maybe this is our choice
Maybe we need to learn
Maybe we need to remember
Maybe we forgot who we are
Maybe we will recall the truth
Maybe we can relax
Maybe we can all calm down
Maybe we can recognize each other
Maybe we can recognize ourselves
Maybe it is all a dream
Maybe we will soon awaken
Maybe there is no mine
Maybe there is no yours
Maybe there is just ours
Maybe we know this
Maybe we just don't realize it
Maybe we soon will
Maybe...

Diarmuid Cronin

This will help us to resist the temptation to focus on material concerns at the expense of spiritual responsibilities.

Matthew 6:19-34.

My Kids, Part Two



I am the leader of a group of middle school aged youth who attend the youth group at our church.  Some of these kiddos are church members, but many of them are not.  In a time when everyone seems to believe that our young people are totally lost and will inevitably be the downfall of the world, I'd like to share with you what these young people are doing this summer.

In case you don't know, we're in the midst of a flood here in southeastern Nebraska.  Those of us in my community are high enough that we will be safe, but only a few miles away, our water treatment plant, our electric plant, and our friends are in BIG trouble.  And this trouble is expected to last throughout the summer and into the fall.  Our food pantry, which normally sees 5-7 people every other week, had 37 applicants this past Monday.  Even if their homes are safe on the other side of the Missouri River, their employment may be in jeopardy if they work on this side as there is no way across unless you travel north to Omaha or south to St. Jo.  People who were hurting already from the economy are now devastated by this latest disaster...and we're just in the beginning phases of it.



The middle school youth group at our church normally meets only during the school year because of vacations, ball games, and other summer activities.  This year, though, the kids wanted to continue to meet, when they could so I've been eating lots of pizza and ice cream delights...and listening to them.  These kids have helped family members and friends move out of their homes and into their basements or garages.  They have watched as whole communities have been closed until further notice.  And they want to do something.

This week they changed their group name to HOPE.  And their first action under this new name was to create a fund for victims of the flood.  They have no idea what the funds will be used for, but as the needs come to light, they want to address them.  They identified possible needs of gasoline for people who's trips to work will now be more than three hours one way, or items they can't get at the food pantry like food for their pets, or extra childcare costs while the parents are commuting.  These are just some ideas they talked about the other night.

Their second action was to begin to work with the mission organization of our church to provide layette kits for babies in need.  They not only want to continue meeting one evening a week to move these projects forward, they asked if they could come two other days of the week, during the day.  They want to take action, not just a little action, but massive action to do something to help others. 



Of course, there was also a little talk about some fun things they could do, but I was impressed that the fun also included a little mission work.  As an example, they talked about contacting a church in Omaha and asking how they could help them...painting, cleaning, childcare, food pantry.  Once the work was finished, then perhaps a trip to the zoo, or a concert.  But I was very impressed that they planned the work part first, and then the fun.  They even talked about getting some fundraisers underway to pay for all of it.

Now, tell me again about how bad the young people of today are.  As someone who has worked with young people for many, many years, I am well aware that our young people are under fire from all sides.  Parents are less and less able to care for them, teachers seem to have given up and are so busy teaching so that "No Child is Left Behind" that they're not getting much help there, and our churches have either cut out youth groups or have forgotten how to reach them.  Kids are no different than they were when I was young.  They want to know that they count.  They want to know that they are important.  They want to do something important. 

Well, they are! 

Illusions

Does this image appear to be moving?  Especially in your peripheral vision?

It's actually a static image, fixed and unmoving, but the design tricks our mind into believing otherwise. 

Is the center square green?  When you remove the background (brown) and the other remaining colors, you find that the center square is actually gray/black.

We must be very careful as we look at things in our lives, because our minds like to play tricks on us.  What we think we see, may not be what is actually there. Or when we look more closely, we may find images that we didn't first identify.

This is true, not only for this type of game that we play, but also for the relationships in our lives.  We only see the pieces that we look for, or that we're allowed to see.  Most of us hide a major portion of ourselves. This is to protect us from the daily damage that can be done by those around us, whether intentional or not. 

When I was teaching fourth grade, I placed a paper heart on the corner of each child's desk every morning.  When something happened to hurt that child in any way, they would tear a piece of their heart off.  All the pieces were kept in a special place in their desk and if something should happen during the day that made them feel good or better, they could put a piece back on their heart.  This was a signal to me and to their classmates what kind of day they were having.

The idea was to help us all recognize that even the tiniest thing said to someone else, even if the intention was good, can cause pain and damage to others.  Depending on other people and actions by them toward this person, a simple statement from us could be the 'final straw' on their stack of feelings for the day. If we saw that their heart had been torn to a very little piece left, we knew to reach out and help that person by extending a little extra kindness toward them.

The final lesson was that we started fresh every day.  When the day was over, there was nothing that could be done to undo it.  But tomorrow is a fresh start, a do-over.  With hope in our hearts, anything is possible.  

I was always amazed at the hearts by the time we went outside for our first recess:  10:00 a.m.  Many of those little hearts had been torn quite a bit in the first two hours of their day, some before they even got to school.  

I'm not sure that the long-term effects of this lesson were substantial for any of my kids, but at least during their year with me, more than just the 3 R's were addressed.  I've never understood how teachers and administrators believe you can address learning math or reading or science if your heart and your soul are hurting.  I'm not saying that one is more important than the other, I'm saying that you must address both to really help the child...or the adult.

I recently had a conversation with a man who is in the midst of some issues with the people that he works with.  He told me that he had been hearing the same thing from them for thirty years...they feel unappreciated, they feel they don't matter to him, they feel that what they do doesn't matter.  This man is very intelligent, is very strong, but when it comes to reaching people (and he's in the people business) he can't see their hearts.  He addresses the building and the program, but he doesn't know how to reach the people where it matters.  He feels badly about it, but he's lost in what to do.  

He sees the illusion, he sees the peripheral, but he doesn't see what's behind it.  It doesn't mean that he doesn't want to, he just never learned how and now, after thirty years in this business, he's wondering if he ever will. 

What he doesn't understand, is that to really see, he's going to have to make himself vulnerable.  He's going to have to open HIS heart and soul.  He can't get others to open theirs to him, if he's not willing to do the same.  That's the part people struggle with.  They've been hurt and let down so many times over the years that they have built a wall around their heart so that no one care tear it again.  The problem with this is that, while it does protect you, it also keeps you from the joy and the fun that you could also have, if you just take down the walls and take a chance. 

People like illusions.  They like to play the games of the mind, unless those games involve relationships with those closest to us.  Then they want sincerity and gentleness.  They want to know that when they risk extending their heart, that you will recognize their vulnerability and keep them safe.  Their hope is that you will see beyond the illusion to what is real and love them, all of them, anyway.    

If I Only Had the Nerve

Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount. 

Clare Booth Luce, 1903-1987



I don't know about you, but I love the movie, The Wizard of Oz.  I think there is just something about sitting down to watch that movie that takes me back to the first time I saw it.  I was about 6 or 7 years old.  I remember loving the part where she opens the door and you move from the black and white world of Kansas (which is where I grew up) to the beautiful colors of the land of Oz.  I loved the munchkins and I loved the music.  I loved dreaming about what was "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." I loved the witch named Glenda, the good witch.  The flying monkeys I wasn't so keen on, in fact I had nightmares about them, but I loved all the rest.  I especially loved her 'coming home' to the people that she loved.

Her friends on her journey through Oz were all special and, over the years of my life, I've used their lessons frequently:  using your brain and feeling with your heart, but the one I think I've probably used the most is the lesson about courage. 

Here was a lion, a fearsome beast.  Who would have thought that a lion would ever be cowardly?  They're such beautiful, majestic animals and when they roar, who wouldn't be afraid?  But I think the lesson was that even lions have things they are afraid of.  Just like human beings, we all have things that frighten us.  There are no exceptions.  Everyone is afraid of something.  And that is OK!  We're supposed to be.  God gave us that feeling to protect ourselves.

What is not OK, is when we allow that fear to keep us from living our lives. 

Every day you either see a scar or courage. Where you dwell will define your struggle. 

~Dodinsky  

Too often, we lose ourselves in the scars of our lives and we make the decision that it is better to live in the fear than to face another struggle or conflict.  What has happened to us before has left such a welt on our soul that we are not willing to risk yet another.  But when we make that choice, we are missing opportunities...to grow, to love, to live.

My dad has had two rounds with his foe, Colon Cancer.  This last round, a couple of years ago, caused him to have major surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation--two rounds of it.  All of us, his brothers and sisters, his wife, and his children, wanted to remove this burden from his life.  We all voiced our desire to alleviate this bitter pill.  My father's response to all of us was, "You just do what you gotta do." 

I've thought about that a lot over the past two years.  Why is it that for some of us, 'doing what we have to do' is so hard?  I think I found an answer to my question one day when I crawled into my dad's pickup to use it.  On a trip to visit my uncle in Iowa a few years ago, my son and I stopped by the birthplace of John Wayne.  It's a small little house in a tiny little southeast Iowa town.  My family are all BIG John Wayne fans so I purchased a magnet and a cap with a quote on them for my dad.  It seemed to me that they were inspirational, not only because Mr. Wayne had said them, but also because it's the way my dad has lived his life.  The quote was,

“Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway.” 

I knew the cap was on the back porch.  I had seen him wear it, but I never knew what happened to the magnet until I got into the pickup that day.  I pulled down the visor to keep the sun out of my eyes and it fell into my lap.  He kept it with him as he traveled around on his daily adventures.

I think we tend to believe that courage is something you have.  That it replaces fear.  What I've learned, from the Wizard and Cowardly Lion, from John Wayne and from my dad, is that courage doesn't replace fear, courage stands alongside fear.  I've never had to face cancer, except through my dad and his brother.  Both of them showed me that  courage is something we all have.  We just have to access it, like the Cowardly Lion.  When the Wizard pinned that medal on him, he realized having courage was a choice he could make.  It's not an easy choice.  But it is a choice. 

We can choose to live in the scars of our lives and miss so many opportunities to live each day to the best of our abilities, or we can choose to take that step out of the scar and into courage.  You see, it's all in our heads.  There is a bully up there that loves to keep us in our place, cowering in the corner.  It berates us and shames us and tells us how unworthy we are of anything good.  It tells us that there is no way we can stand up to our fear and be successful.

But you know what happens when you stand up to a bully.  Nine times out of ten, they back down.  They're more afraid than you are, they just cover it with their venom.  Stand up to the bully and they run for the corner, never to come back.

Take the bully out of your head...today.  Saddle up that horse and ride, ride like the wind!  I'll finish with one more quote from John Wayne, “Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday. ” 

Do you have the nerve?


Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says... I'll try again tomorrow.Mary Anne Radmacher-Hershey

Building Bridges

Treat people as if they were what they ought to be,
and you help them to become what they are capable
of being.
--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

We had an 'issue' at youth group last night.  I am the director of a youth program.  I just started there last month so I'm just getting to know these kiddos and I like them very much.  It's been a few years since I've worked with this age group.  I had forgotten how 'right out there' middle school kids are.  Boy, something pops into their head and it's out of their mouth.  It's kind of refreshing after working with adults (I still do that too) who measure and weigh everything before they speak.  I had a friend tell me that she had tried to work with the youth group, but she just couldn't do it because they were just too mean.  She said she had to leave the room several times in tears.  I don't think they're intentionally mean, I just don't think they've learned to filter anything yet.  Isn't that what maturation is all about?

As the new director, I was being tested last night.  All of the kids were pushing me to see just how far they could go before I drew the line.  The first few nights there, I had jokingly held control of the group, but last night a few boys decided to push the limit and it was time to draw the line.  They needed to know that I, as the adult leader, would be in charge.  Kids, even middle school age kids, need to know where the lines are.  Once they know this, then everyone can settle in and feel safe together.  I gave the ring-leader of the group a choice:  he could be courteous and respectful of me and the others who were speaking or he could go to the back of the room by himself.  He chose C, neither of the above.  (Don't you just love the kids who always choose that one?  Really, I do.  They keep you on your toes).  I offered him the two choices again and added this time that if he didn't choose, I would choose for him.  Again, he chose C, so my choice for him was to go to the back of the room where he could talk all he wanted to, to himself, and not bother the rest of us.

He thought I was joking and then, immediately, he was sorry.  I assured him that when he showed me that he could be respectful, I would allow him to rejoin us and I urged him to move.  Immediately, another young man, whom I hadn't seen before, said that he liked the old director better than me.  I thanked him for his opinion and asked him if he had anything else he wanted to share.  When he was put in the spotlight, he refused any further opinions.  While this new young man and I were having our very short conversation at the front of the room, my first little friend was having words with another of the leaders in the back of the room.  He became belligerent and refused to comply.  I was not aware that this was happening in the back because I had started the evening's lesson.  The kids were quiet and attentive and we were reviewing last week's lesson when I heard the leader in the back of the room say, "If that's the way you feel, then you shouldn't be here.  Maybe you need to go home."  The young man looked dumbstruck.  Of course, his answer was, "OK.  Maybe I will."  And he got up and left.  Three other boys followed him out.  As they walked out, the leader told them that if that was their choice, they would not be allowed to come to the end of the year Beach Party next week.  And still they walked out.  Another of the leaders followed the boys outside and then called their parents so they knew that the boys had left our care.

This was not how I had planned for the evening to go.  I had intended to present the kids with a lesson on Belonging and Love.  (Hmmm....best laid plans???)  All night long I dreamt about those boys walking out--the boys who really need the youth group.  I prayed first thing this morning, that God would take what happened and turn it around for those young people.  The next several minutes, after their departure, the group said a prayer, each young person voicing their needs and thoughts.  I was impressed with the maturity of the kids that stayed.  They prayed for those boys and they prayed for the group as a whole.  The rest of the evening went very well with the group choosing a mission statement for themselves:
   
  Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.  I Timothy 4:12   Impressive, huh?

I am saddened by the happenings of last night.  Of all the young people there, those boys need that group more than any of the rest.  Their home lives are not rich in love and acceptance and I'm afraid that without a group like ours, they will join another, less advantageous group.  I pray that God will turn this around for these kids and that the maturity and grace that I observed in the other kids will help them to reach out and bring them all back.

 
But we went wrong when we backed him into a corner.  The only way out for him was to leave.  To maintain his sense of dignity and respect by the other kids, he had to leave and hope that someone, anyone, would follow him.  My intention, when I sent him back, was to get the group started and then to go back and talk to him, privately, myself.  He didn't allow us to get that far, for all of this took place in about five minutes.  (I forgot the reaction time of middle school kids.  I should have had a leader take over immediately for me at the front of the group and gone with him to the back.  Maybe we could have diffused all of this).

You see, we were both right.  He needed to understand and demonstrate respect for me and for the others in the group, leaders and kids.  I needed to respect his position in the group of his peers, especially the boys sitting there.  This young man is a leader, no doubt.  He is charismatic, he is dynamic, and he is full of life.  We need to find a way to channel that energy and produce a positive outcome for him and the group.  We're going to just keep praying that the Lord will work his miracles and bring those boys back to us (with an apology to everyone for their behavior, I hope).  We need his leadership and courage, for it took great courage for him to walk out of there in front of so many of his friends.  I privately had to applaud the young men who stood with him, their friend.  One of them in particular, knew he would be in trouble with his parents and made the choice anyway.

Please don't misunderstand, I'm not saying what they did was all right, but it wasn't all wrong either.  They're young and they need to understand respect and cooperation.  This is a group and we must find a way to work together as a youth family.  As such, we will have disagreements and falling-outs.  Last night was one of those.  Now we must find a way to reconcile our differences and build a bridge to the future together.  This is why I love what I do. 

When I was very little, my dad was in construction.  He built bridges.  I think I must have inherited that gene.  With God's help, I'll find a way to build a bridge here.  I hope those boys will all be on the other side, but even if they are not, I will be sure that they know that I love them no matter what and so does God.

Learning to Dance in the Rain...The Power of Gratitude

My friend, Mac Anderson, at Simple Truths shared a post with me this morning that I'd like to share with you. I think we all tend to forget just how blessed we are until we get a reminder. Here it is on this Monday morning:

Your Reminder...


The date was July 16, 2008. It was late in the afternoon and I was sitting in my hotel room in Louisville, Kentucky. I was scheduled to speak that evening for the Kentucky Association of School Administrators (KASA).
I was a little "down in the dumps." I hadn't gotten to exercise lately because of my traveling schedule and recently I'd experienced some mild bouts of vertigo (that inner ear condition that can cause the room to start spinning.) You got it...speaking and "spinning" are not good partners!

My keynote presentation was scheduled for 7:00 PM, but I had been invited to show up at 6:00 to see a performance they said I'd enjoy. Little did I know that I was about to see something I would never forget.

They introduced the young musician. Welcome...Mr. Patrick Henry Hughes. He was rolled onto the stage in his wheelchair, and began to play the piano. His fingers danced across the keys as he made beautiful music.

He then began to sing as he played, and it was even more beautiful. For some reason, however, I knew that I was seeing something special. There was this aura about him that I really can't explain and the smile...his smile was magic!

About ten minutes into Patrick's performance, someone came on the stage and said..."I'd like to share a 7-minute video titled, The Patrick Henry Hughes story." And the lights went dim.

Patrick Henry Hughes was born with no eyes, and a tightening of the joints which left him crippled for life. However, as a child, he was fitted with artificial eyes and placed in a wheelchair. Before his first birthday, he discovered the piano. His mom said, "I could hit any note on the piano, and within one or two tries, he'd get it." By his second birthday, he was playing requests (You Are My Sunshine, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star). His father was ecstatic. "We might not play baseball, but we can play music together."

Today, Patrick is a junior at the University of Louisville. His father attends classes with him and he's made nearly all A's, with the exception of 3 B's He's also a part of the 214 member marching band. You read it right...the marching band! He's a blind, wheelchair-bound trumpet player; and he and his father do it together. They attend all the band practices and the half-time performance in front of thousands. His father rolls and rotates his son around the field to the cheers of Patrick's fans. In order to attend Patrick's classes and every band practice, his father works the graveyard shift at UPS. Patrick said..."My dad's my hero."

But even more than his unbelievable musical talent, it was Patrick's "attitude of gratitude" that touched my soul. On stage, between songs, he would talk to the audience about his life and about how blessed he was. He said, "God made me blind and unable to walk. BIG DEAL! He gave me the ability...the musical gifts I have...the great opportunity to meet new people."

When his performance was over, Patrick and his father were on the stage together. The crowd rose to their feet and cheered for over five minutes. It gave me giant goose bumps!

My life was ready to meet Patrick Henry Hughes. I needed a hero, and I found one for the ages. If I live to be a hundred, I'll never forget that night, that smile, that music, but most importantly, that wonderful "attitude of gratitude."

I returned to Chicago and shared Patrick's story with my wife, my friends, and our team at Simple Truths. About two weeks later, I received a letter from a friend. He said, "Mac, here is a quote from Vivian Greene that I think you'll love!"

"Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
it's about learning how to dance in the rain!"

I thought...that's it! We all face adversity in our life. However, it's not the adversity, but how we react to it that will determine the joy and happiness in our life. During tough times, do we spend too much time feeling sorry for ourselves, or, can we, with gratitude...learn how to dance in the rain?

It almost sounds too simple to feel important, but one word...gratitude, can change your attitude, thus, your life, forever. Sarah Breathnach said it best...

"When we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that's present....we experience heaven on earth."
~~~~~~
What I just shared is the introduction to my book, Learning to Dance in the Rain...The Power of Gratitude. My co-author is BJ Gallagher and she is one of the most talented and creative writers I've every known. It was an honor to work with her on this beautiful book that can truly change the way you think about life.

Keep Dancing,

Mac Anderson
Founder, Simple Truths