Check out these funny and innovative New Year's Resolutions! Enjoy these and make some for yourself...enjoy!!

• Just for today, I will not sit in my living room all day in my nightdress. Instead, I will move my computer into the bedroom.I will no longer waste my time relieving the past, instead I will spend it worrying about the future.
• I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses.
• I will do less laundry and use more deodorant.
• I will avoid taking a bath whenever possible and conserve more water.
• Assure my lawyer that I will never again show up drunk at a custody hearing.
• I will give up chocolates totally. 100%. Completely. Honestly....
• I will try to figure out why I *really* need nine e-mail addresses.
• I will stop sending e-mails to my wife (husband).
• I resolve to work with neglected children -- my own.
• I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person.
• I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I'm not a clock watcher.
• I will read the manual... just as soon as I can find it.
• I will think of a password other than "password."
• I will not tell the same story at every get together.
• I won't worry so much.
• I will cut my hair.
• I will grow my hair.
• I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!
• I will be more imaginative.
• I will not hang around girls - they think you love them and that sucks.
• I will not ring the stewardess button on airplanes just to get her phone number.

1 Peter 1:3
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.

Oh, So Many Changes

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another. ~Anatole France

 



 

As I read this quotation this morning, I had to stop and wonder about all the 'lives' I have had.  I jokingly talk quite frequently about doing things 'in a former life' and people tend to find that humorous. 

 

It's interesting that I find myself writing my own words today instead of sharing someone else's whom I find challenging or inspiring.  The past few days several friends and I have carried on an ever-evolving conversation about this very topic.  They are amazed when I talk about my life as the christian education director at a church far away and then my next life as a preschool teacher and new mother, then my life as the founder and creator of an organization for children who were abused or neglected, and then my life as the director of a family resource center providing all levels and types of services to families in rural middle-America.  Then there was my life as an unemployed middle-ager with a teen aged son. And now my life as the program director at another church.  That's just the last twenty-two years.  There were many other lives before these.

 

These friends have lived in the same community their entire lives, doing the same jobs, living in the same house, with the same friends.  They are amazed at the "adventure" my life has been.  I am amazed at theirs.

 

I don't know that I would call my life an adventure.  The dictionary describes adventure as: an exciting experience, a bold undertaking, or financial speculation.  Well, I guess my life up to this age of fifty-five years, has been an adventure. 

 

Certainly, it has had its excitement.  No, I haven't had glamorous trips around the world.  I don't party with the movers and shakers at any level.  I work hard at keeping in the background as much as I possibly can so that what I do doesn't become about me, but about the cause to which I've given my time, my money, and my talents.  Certainly, the majority of the folks reading this will think there was little excitement in what I did, but for me the challenge of taking on that position, that cause, was and is excitement.  Making a difference and leaving that place a little better because I was there is the excitement. 

 

I am sure that many would not think what I have done was bold, but if you had known me as a child you would be amazed at some of the things I have done.  I was very shy as a child, afraid to speak to anyone who wasn't well-known to me.  I have sat with senators and law enforcement officers and leaders at the local, state and national levels about the issues that I hold dear to my heart.  I have called those meetings, and those people have come to talk to me.  Pretty bold for a little girl who used to hope that no one noticed her.

 

And about that financial speculation, well, anyone who knows me knows that I have tried never to make money the issue.  I am not a wealthy woman by any stretch of the imagination.  In fact, the last few years have been a challenge for me financially, but I am a survivor and I will continue to do the work that I believe is important and know that it always works out in the end.  Don't get me wrong, I am doing alright but I will NEVER make what I do about the money.  Some will say that this philosophy is foolish.  For those folks, I simply say, "You will never understand, and that's OK." 

 

This life--all of it, the BIG one--is about growing, stretching yourself, and continually learning...about the world, about those around you, and mostly about yourself.  Each life held its lessons and at the end of all of them, its about what you did to make the world and the people around you better, because of some little thing you may have done, or not done as the case may be.

 

Each life will have its challenges, its bold steps, and its financial speculations, but it will also hold all the riches that come with meeting those challenges, bold steps, and financial speculations head-on, accepting them, and surpassing them.  Then you can rise to the next level...

 

And begin the next life. 

 

"Neither do men pour new wine into old wineskins.
If they do, the skins will burst, the wine will run out and the wineskins will be ruined.
No, they pour new wine into new wineskins, and both are preserved."Matthew 9:17

 



Funny Grade School Exams



For all my teacher friends as they begin the new school year...

History Of The World According To American Grade School Student Exam Papers

1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in Hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and travelled by Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.
2. Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread made without any ingrediants. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada.
3. Solomon had three hundred wives and seven hundred porcupines.
4. The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn’t have history. The Greeks also had Myths. A Myth is a female moth.
5. Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of that name.
6. Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death his career sufferred a dramatic decline.
7. Eventually the Romans conquered the Greeks. History calls people Romans because they never stayed in one place for long.
8. Julius Ceaser extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The ides of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be made King. Dying he gasped out: ‘Tee hee, Brutus’
9. Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak and was canonized by Bernard Shaw. Finally Magna Carta provided that no man should be hanged twice for the same offense.
10. Another story was William Tell who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his sons head.
11. Queen Elizabeth was the ‘Virgin Queen’. As a Queen she was a great success. When she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted ‘hurrah’.
12. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible. Another important invention was the circulation of the blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking. And Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100 foot clipper.
13. The greates writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter. Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couplet. Romeo’s last wish was to be laid by Juliet.
14. Writing at the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained.
15. One of the causes of the revolutionary war was the English put tacks in their tea. Also the colonists would send their parcels through the post without stamps. Finally the colnists won the war and no longer had to pay for taxis. Delegates from the original 13 states formed the contented congress. Thomas Jefferson, a virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the declaration of independence. Franklin discovered electricity by rubbing two cats backwards and declared, ‘A horse divided against itself cannot stand’ Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.
16. Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practised on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German and half Italian and half English. He was very large.
17. Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died from this.
18. The nineteenth century was a time of a great many thoughts and inventions. People stopped reproducing by hand and started reproducing by machine. The invention of the steam boat caused a network of rivers to spring up. Cyrus McCormick invented the McCormick raper, which did the work of a hundred men.
19. Louis Paster discovered a cure for rabbis. Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the organ of the species. Madman Curie discovered raio. And Karl Marx became one of the Mark Brothers.
20. The first world war, caused by the assignation of the Arch-Duck by an anahist, ushered in a new error in the anals of human history.

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

Psalms 127:3-5

Be Who You Must Be

I don’t know where you are on your path
I have never stood in your shoes
I see not with your eyes.
I know not what your purpose is here
In this stage of your evolution
But I feel blessed to know you
As you are not in my life by chance
And you are my teacher
As I hope you learn from me
I pray I show reverence to you
I pray not to judge you
I wish to let you be
Who you are
Who you dream of being
I will just be beside you
And watch you grow
And the day will come for sure
When we will know why
Our paths crossed this way
And until then my friend
Be who you must be

Diarmuid Cronin

"You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous – how well I know it.

You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.

How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered!”

Psalm 139:13-17

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats..


2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.


3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the

second person.


4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.


5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.


6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.


7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.


8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.


9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.


10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.


Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.


Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;


BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.



Have a wonderful day with many *smiles*

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."
Matthew 19:14

The Seven Powers for Self Control

Lesson 7:  The Power of Intention

Mistakes are opportunities to learn

“A man's errors are his portals of discovery.”

James Joyce

We are now at the final lesson for the Seven Powers for Self Control.  We have learned about the Power of Perception, the Power of Unity, the Power of Attention, the Power of Free Will, the Power of Love, and the Power of Acceptance and now we will focus on the Power of Intention. This power is about looking at mistakes and seeing them as just that…a mistake, a learning opportunity. 

Let’s take a moment and talk about ‘mistakes.’  We all make them.  We all would rather not, but as human beings we will ALL of us make them.  The question becomes, “Why did we make them?”  To really discover the answer to this question, we have to take a look at our motivation or our intent.  If we hurt someone’s feelings, did we intend to hurt their feelings?  If we damaged something, did we intend to damage it?  I’m afraid we all know people who have bad intentions behind their actions.  They really don’t care who they hurt as long as they get what they want.  Then there are the people who deliberately set out to hurt.  Their intention is to hurt someone or a group of someones.  They want to inflict damage.

Thankfully, most of us don’t fit into this category.  When we make a mistake, it is an error.  It was never our intention to hurt or inflict pain of any kind.  It is these experiences that present us with the opportunity to grow and learn.  Think about the mistakes you’ve made in your life.  These were probably experiences that helped to shape who you are today.  You learned lessons from them or you wouldn’t still remember them.  Perhaps the lessons were good ones, maybe they were not so good, maybe even painful.  The point is, there was a lesson you learned from the mistake.

“Mistake is the global term I am using to define conflict situations.  When we make “poor” choices, we create conflicts for ourselves and others…If we are honest with ourselves, we know that in order to act better and change our ways, we must feel good about ourselves.  When we feel poorly, we tend to act poorly,” Becky Bailey tells us in her book Conscious Discipline.   “It is not human nature to feel bad about mistakes and good about accomplishments.  We learn this mind set.”

We need to look at the opportunity presented to us when we make a mistake. When you make a mistake do you see a moment to be responsible or do you see an opportunity to blame.  It is a choice, you know.  I’ve worked with children (and adults) for a long time.  What’s the first thing that happens when there is a conflict or a mistake?  Immediately, there is finger pointing.  “She made me do it!”  Really?  To every mistake made, there was a decision made.  You chose that course of action.  Sometimes you thought far enough ahead to see the consequences and decided the outcome was acceptable to you.  Sometimes you acted before you thought, requiring you to reflect on your choice and its consequences later.  Either way, you made a decision to act.  Either way there are consequences for that choice.  

If we love and accept ourselves, then we are ready, willing, and able to step up and take responsibility for our actions.  We understand the mistake that was made and we know that we will learn from it.  But more than that, we will love ourselves in spite of our actions.  We understand that our intention was honorable.  That we meant good, it just didn’t  turn out that way.  We accept responsibility and we attempt to make amends.  The lesson gets learned.

“What do you first do when you learn to swim? You make mistakes, do you not? And what happens? You make other mistakes, and when you have made all the mistakes you possibly can without drowning - and some of them many times over - what do you find? That you can swim? Well - life is just the same as learning to swim! Do not be afraid of making mistakes, for there is no other way of learning how to live!”

Alfred Adler

Mr. Adler is correct.  Mistakes are how we learn.  It was always posted in my classroom, “Welearn more from our mistakes than we do from our successes.”  This is true, when our intention behind the mistake was good and genuine. 

 

This completes our study of the Seven Powers for Self Control.  It is something we spend our entire lives trying to accomplish.  It is not something that we will do in one day, or one week, or even one year.  It is a process we will spend our lives working to achieve.  Hopefully, when that last day comes, we’ll look back and see that we learned our lessons to the best of our ability. 

You Want Me to What????

I think I've mentioned here a few times (OK, a LOT of times) that I'm a teacher.  This is a label that I did not give myself.  It's one that I've known my whole life I had.  There has never been any doubt in my mind that I was put on this earth to teach and over the course of my fifty-three years I have taught a lot of subjects and even more people.  I've taught little tiny folks and grown-up folks; I've taught new moms (and dads) and old moms (and dads).  I've taught middle school students and high school students (thank God I was in a church for those folks.  I needed all the help I could get)!  I've taught public school, preschool, and Sunday school.  I've taught staff members, community members, and anyone who would listen.  I've done my best to teach my son.


But while I was teaching, I was learning.  Way beyond any information I was imparting to my classes, was what they were teaching me!  As I look back on what has been thirty five years in education, I am overwhelmed by the lessons that I have learned from every one of these people, young and old.  Little did I know, as I entered college to get my education, that I would receive much, much more than I've ever given. 
I thank each and every one of them!

And now I'm at a new junction in my life.  We have moved to this new community and when people ask what brought us here, I am honest and tell them that I don't really know.  We were both ready for a change.  We both wanted to move closer to family and friends.  We picked up a map and after some investigation on the internet, we chose a community that sounded good.  When we visited here, everything felt right.  It was decided...this would be our new home.  Most people choose a new home, a new community because of their work or because they've decided to retire there.  Not us, we chose here because that little voice I talked about a few days ago, told us this was where we were supposed to be.  We had made a list of the things that we would like to have in a new place, and within the first hour we were here, we found every one of them.  We are supposed to be here.

The question then became, what are we here for?  My son continues to work on his technology business and I continue to paint, both the interior of my home and the folk art pictures I love.  I give piano and voice lessons.  And more and more I know that I am being called to do something much bigger than I ever dreamed possible.  It's a scary time but what an exciting time!  I'm all about life lessons, so I keep asking myself what it is I'm supposed to be getting from all of this. 

Well, here is what I've learned....so far:  life isn't meant to be played safe.  We are created to reach out and attempt the impossible knowing that there is a power much greater than ourselves that will guide us, if we let it.  I've been forced, through my unemployment, to step out of the safety net and trust--trust those around me, trust myself, but more than that trust that all things work for good.  I have been amazed at the opportunities that have opened for me in just the last few days.  And I am thankful for the lessons that I continue to learn...from all the 'students' I'm teaching.